Tuesday, July 29, 2008

same old story...............

Where to start?I have mentioned him on here before,a man at work who had a thing for me,and I didnt,then did (well didnt think I did)and more recently who I had a little kiss with on double bubble (double yea!!).Well,I cant even remember now if I blogged this but he was talking about leaving London and I suddenly saw what I really wanted-Him.
After a lot of faffing about and letting downs (by him)we eventually got together,and it felt right.Very right in fact.We've talked about long term stuff,like the future and how to work things around work etc.He's admitted that he's messed me around because he's scared of getting hurt,like I'm not,but I suppose he's a lot younger than me and doesnt have the experience of getting hurt in relationships like I have.
So all is well and we were supposed to go out today and night,and I had that feeling this morning that he was going to bail on me,instinct.I texted him and then phoned him and he wouldnt pick up,so here I am that stupid thing called hope having being ingnited in me and taken away,again
I cant even just move on and forget about him like I wouldd with any random man I'd met how did this cos he means something to me even without all the relationship stuff as I've known him for 2-3 years and we've been through quite alot at work as we used to work together as partners.I really thought this time I might get a chance to be happy with someone who likes me for what I am,rather than what men often think I am.Stupid me eh?Worse thing is I know he is genuine but it seems I am not worth the risk.

Still,wine has its uses eh?

10 comments:

Girl With The Golden Touch said...

Aww Lomes. You know what, I hate, HATE this. I never really relax and never feel secure - If I don't get a text back within ten I'm sure I have been dumped or something.

Did they boy have a reason to not reply and have you still not heard anything all day from him? Surely he wouldn't just sell you out as such, if you work together?

BTW, your new laptop looks ace!

thoughts running through my head.... said...

he keeps bottling it and its been left to me to do the chasing so to speak,he did ALL of the chasing before I saw the light.I think I am one of those people who are destined to be on their own in life-hoenstly,its not just because of this,I just think I am.

SandDancer said...

Oh love, sorry to hear about this. Has he been in contact yet? Rather a poor effort for him to just ignore his phone even if he is worried about getting hurt.

It seems like your job makes things more difficult than relationships are at the best of times.

Hope things pick up for you soon.
xx

Annette said...

Oh Thoughts, I agree with sandancer. It wouldn't hurt him to at least contact you.
Leaving you in mid-air is sooo wrong.

Area Trace No Search said...

I feel for you girl, but can't offer any advice.

I can't even begin to arrange my own relationships... how about damaging him in some way as an act of revenge?

I do love revenge.

thoughts running through my head.... said...

oh,dont be nice to me it'll make me cry.ATNS,revenge is sweet as I always say but I might settle for making him jealous atm!

Area Trace No Search said...

If you need help, just let me know...

Where are you? Are you OK?

thoughts running through my head.... said...

no,not really Area.I'll maybe email you when I can not be so negative,things arent good atm.

Area Trace No Search said...

make sure you do lass. For what it's worth, I'm thinking about you.
X

Girl*Next*Door said...

*hugs* T. Not much else I can say but hope you're ok hun xxx

Take care of yourself.